Warp Speed

My roommate Karen, the funniest woman on earth, often keeps up a monologue that leaves me in stitches. Yesterday she was pontificating on the nature of God.

"I think God has a warp speed button, because I don't know where the time goes between when I get out of the shower and when I have to leave for work. I can see him up there now. He's like, 'Seven forty-five...eight thirty! Seven forty-five...eight thirty! Seven forty fiiiiiiive...EIGHT THIRTY! Ha ha ha! I could do this all day!' Yeah, some people think God is a woman, but I think he's a fifteen year old boy."